Tasting Notes for Ultimate Pimento Cheese

Aug 28, 23

What a difference a day makes! Now that this stuff has melded, I can give some definitive answers to yesterday’s questions and formulate my next recipe with a high degree of certainty.

Just to recap, the stuff I made yesterday followed this recipe:

  • 1 lb. sharp cheddar cheese, grated by hand
  • 1 lb. Monterrey jack cheese, grated by hand
  • 1 package cream cheese, softened to room temperature
  • 2 1/2 cups of Duke’s mayonnaise
  • 2 large jars of Lindsay pimentos, drained
  • 2 teaspoons of sugar
  • 2 teaspoons cayenne pepper
  • 1 tablesppon onion powder
  • 1 tablespoon Crystal with garlic hot sauce
  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • Fresh ground black pepper

Here’s the revisions I am going to make:

First of all, the cream cheese doesn’t add anything, so I am taking it out. I would even argue it detracts. It puts a cream cheese note in there that I just don’t like. I don’t want to eat it and think, yeah, there’s cream cheese in this. No. To hell with that. Cream cheese gets the boot.

Next, this stuff is quite hot. Now, Pawley Island’s Palmetto cheese is quite hot, too. It is on par with that, but maybe a cunt-hair hotter. I think one teaspoon will do the job.

Next, too much onion. I don’t want to be hit with the onion, but just sort of hinted at. Kind of an onion wink. I’m going to cut the onion powder by half.

Next, increase sugar to one full tablespoon.

Significantly more black pepper, like 2 or 3 tablespoons.

Lastly, I think this stuff could take two more jars of the Lindsay pimentos, but I’m going to add just one more and see what that gets me.

Here’s the revised recipe:

  • 1 lb. sharp cheddar cheese, grated by hand
  • 1 lb. Monterrey jack cheese, grated by hand
  • 2 1/2 cups of Duke’s mayonnaise (I also think Bama would rock)
  • 3 large jars of Lindsay pimentos, drained
  • 1 tablespoon of sugar
  • 1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
  • 1 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1 tablespoon Crystal with garlic hot sauce
  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons fresh ground black pepper

This is going to be seriously close to the ultimate pimento cheese.